Archive for 一月, 2009

曾經

一月 13, 2009

曾經的,如今的,該忘卻的,都應該忘卻。 
    今日在群裡跟朋友聊了很多,很多。想想,那些過去的記憶,有些確實是改忘記了,只是,還是捨不得 
而已。究竟,是為什麼捨不得,而又無從得知。如今的生活,說是快樂抑或悲傷,誰又能明白。有的時候就 
連我自己都不能知道我到底在想什麼,想哭的時候我在笑,想笑的時候我在沉默。整天掛這虛偽的面具,週 
遊在朋友之間,曾經問過自己,難道這就是我想要的嗎? 
    是快樂嗎?為什麼我感受不到絲毫的歡樂呢?是痛苦嗎?但是為什麼又沒有悲傷呢?沒事的時候,我就 
獨自坐在那裡,靜靜的,腦裡是一片空白的。我不想刻意的去想些什麼,也不願去做什麼。我只想呆呆的, 
坐在那裡,什麼都不要做,什麼都不要想,就那樣的,一直的,永遠的下去,只是這個世界真的有永遠嗎? 
    學校的日子裡,是快樂的,也是寂寞的。曾經的朋友都沒有了聯繫,曾經的知己或許也已經將我忘記。 
只是一個人的生活。或許是忙碌,或許是清閒。整日的坐在課堂上,似沉思,似走神。不知道,想什麼。聽 
著老師的話語,心卻已經穿越了時光,回到了過去。休息的時間,看著過道上來來往往的人群。那一對對情 
侶。我也有個深愛我的人,只是,我愛他嗎?總是喜歡拿她與以前的她對比。種種,種種。還是無法忘記 
嗎?心,為何會這樣的痛呢? 
    有的人,總是說我很懦弱,因為我活在回憶之中,說我是在逃避。我真的是在逃避嗎?誰懂,誰能明 
白,就連我都不知道我是否明白,哈哈,人生啊,究竟是什麼啊為何這樣的戲弄我呢?我不想這樣,以前的 
那個單純的我多麼的好啊。早熟嗎?或許吧!懂的,經歷的多了,一切都會明白了!知道嗎?我想哭,真的 
好想哭,可是我卻又不敢哭,想要發洩,卻又無從發洩。我是寂寞的,心靈的寂寞,空間的寂寞。永遠的我 
只能是一個人的我。身邊沒有人能陪伴我的我。即使是愛我的人,心裡會有嗎? 
    我不想再回憶了,痛苦的愛早已經過去了,我想我早就已經放下了。確實,我真的已經放下了,只是, 
那段回憶沒在我認為最美好的回憶,卻始終的繚繞在我的腦海之中。到底,我是不是要忘記呢!過去的都已 
經過去了。再怎樣回憶都沒有用。確實,很多人都這樣的跟我說,我也是這樣的認為的。愛嗎?我擁有了, 
友情嗎?我也擁有。只是,心靈上那處空白到底是什麼呢? 
    我喜歡寂寞,卻又反感寂寞。我不懂,這是為何。明明應該快樂的我,卻是那麼的悲傷。至少,在我認 
為是悲傷的吧!我在笑,開懷的大笑。哈哈,哈哈。所有的人都認為是個瘋子,做的事,說的話。所有人都 
是這樣的認為。

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鷹的悲歌

一月 13, 2009

那段時間,總想寫點什麼來發洩心中的鬱悶,可抬起了筆,卻又不曉得該寫些什麼,該從何寫起。百般無奈,只得找幾個朋友出去走走。朋友說,動物園里新來了只蒼鷹,問我要不要去看看。 
    是鷹嗎,心中不由得震顫了一下。呵!真的有些懷念了呢,自從那年在草原見到這宇宙的精靈,就再也無法從心中除去它的影子。那麼地不可一世,那麼地高傲,彷彿是天上的神,讓我崇拜,讓我敬仰。 
    像是去探望以為久別的朋友,我迫不及待地去了動物園,並懷著激動的心情,順著那塊寫著“鷹巢”的牌子向深處走去。然而, 
    這並不是我所認識的鷹! 
    與其說是鷹,倒不如稱之為巨大的病鳥。 
    像犯人一般,爪上拴著鐵鐐,沒有一點精神。翅膀無力地拍打著。想必掙扎了許久了吧,背上灰色的羽毛脫落許多,露出了褐色的絨毛。 
    不!我所熱愛的鷹不是如此! 
    廣闊平坦的內蒙古草原上,太陽緩緩地落下。夕陽慵懶的餘暉中,牧民們趕著羊群唱著牧歌,一片祥和。 
    抬頭仰望天空,會看見一個或幾個黑點在空中盤旋,那便是鷹。 
    這天是自由地翱翔著。時而俯沖向羊群,時而又直衝雲霄。天地之間,彷彿只有鷹的存在。高亢的鳴叫,清脆嘹亮。和著耳邊吹過的風,讓我心動,卻也征服了整個兒草原。牧民這時會停下來,望著這自由的鳥兒,聆聽著這天籟,朝拜著自由之神。 
    鷹的自由是任何動物都無法比擬的。膺選擇了天地之間,朗朗乾坤;選擇了只有鷹才懂得幸福。那是一種超脫,一種智慧,一種閃著不滅的理性,一中體味過歲月蕭瑟的充實和自信。鷹的偉岸讓我想起了希臘神話中崇尚自由的普羅米修斯。 
    可如今面對這只鷹,我一點也找不出王者的威嚴。唯有眼睛,依然那麼深邃那麼令人敬畏。只是少了飛翔時的興奮,而多了鷹不曾有過的哀傷與悲愴。 
    是呀,這孤傲的鳥王如今卻與他昔日曾藐視的野鳥野兔一樣關在這說大的籠子裡。甚至連卑微的麻雀都可以站在枝頭嘲笑他。 
    鷹低吟著。 
    我的心也忽然地沉了下去,彷彿聽見了悲哀的歌。它用力地拍打著翅膀,努力向上飛。可爪上的鐵鐐卻讓它無奈。鷹低沉地叫著,然後忽然猛地向上沖,可無情的鐵鍊又將它拽住。就這樣,他不停地掙扎,不停地哀鳴,不顧一切地向上沖,只想掙脫束縛。它將尊嚴自由看得比什麼都重要。而幻覺中的疼痛卻是實際的好幾倍,那些痛苦找不到出口,只有埋在心裡,無度地作自我折磨,直到筋疲力盡。 
    我注視著鷹,感到心那麼地痛,流進嘴裡的液體澀澀的,正如我此時心中的滋味。 
    我知道,我流淚了。 
    看著鷹,我想到我也曾經渴望奮鬥過,渴望飛翔過,渴望燃燒過。可四周高高的圍牆讓我無法看見外面的世界,也將我的夢一點點撕碎。為了讓自己好過一些,我不得不強迫自己忘記曾經的幻想,不得不親手將自己對自由的渴望埋葬,不得不想生活屈服,向命運低頭。想到這些,我哭了。 
    我周圍的人用他們所謂的愛鑄成了一座玻璃溫室。為了不讓我受傷,為了不讓我迷失回家的方向,他們將我管在裡面。而對於外面的世界,我只有透過玻璃張望,卻連碰觸一片葉子的的可能都沒有。我知道,他們是愛我的。可他們從未想過,如果一個人年輕時不能夠燃燒,不能夠奮鬥,哪怕將來在長壽,也無法與永恆對抗。能和永恆對抗,和永恆一樣高貴的只有青春,短暫卻有燦爛無比的青春。他們更無從知道,青春的心,永遠都是渴望飛翔的。 
     “想什麼呢,快走吧,都下雨了。”朋友拽了我一把。 
    下雨了? !連上蒼都落淚了嗎?只是這淚是為鷹而流還是為我而流,抑或為整個世界而流。
    一周後,朋友告訴我,那隻鷹死了。 
    我木然了,幾乎不敢相信自己的耳朵。我丟下目瞪口呆的朋友,瘋狂地跑了出去,攔住一輛的士,直奔動物園。 
    站在空空的籠子前,我低下了頭。淚不覺已溢出了眼眶,我失去了知己。 
    飼養員告訴我,那隻鷹是自己撞在樹上死的。我知道,這才是鷹的個性。他太愛自己了,不忍再讓自己承受失去自由的屈辱。他寧可選擇死亡也絕不苟且偷生。 
     “那天大概就在這個時候,那隻鷹叫了好久,聲音都有些嘶啞了,還在叫。然後突然飛起來一頭撞在樹上。”飼養員說,“真不知道怎麼搞的,所有食物都是按照野生鷹的食譜配的,怎麼會死呢?” 
    我怕沒說什麼走開了。他當然不會懂,鷹對自由的追求是自然界人和動物都無法比擬的。 
    鷹活著不單要靠食物,還要有夜晚壯麗的蒼穹,拂曉輝煌的天空,日落緋紅迷人的晚霞,朦朧的月光,雄偉的山岳。 
    它所追求的不僅僅是生活本身,還有自由帶來的快樂。巨翅排空,搏擊駭浪,直上雲霄,藐視腳下的世界……這才是它最幸福的時候。它不需要人類將它保護起來,它要的是拼搏是奮鬥。 
    只可惜飼養員並不理解這些。他只是將鷹當做一隻普通的鳥兒對待,卻不知道自由飛翔是天使的語言,失語的天使將會多麼悲哀。 
    不覺間耳邊彷彿響起了那鷹臨死前的哀鳴。我知道,這是鷹的悲歌,是積蓄一生的吶喊。這世間所有的生命,面對生命的流逝都會和人一樣,充滿徹骨的悲涼。人死後會有相識的為他遠遠近近高高低低地哭泣,而這只鷹呢誰為它送行?無人哭泣,只有那悲歌為這一輩子畫上了句號,為這段屈辱的牢籠生活畫上句號。 
    我緩緩地走出動物園。天漸漸陰了,豆大的雨點落了下來。路上的行人加快了回家的腳步。我依舊緩緩地走著,任雨水浸透衣服。我知道,上蒼在為他的天使哭泣。 
    就讓我和老天一起享受這此刻的悲傷吧!讓我默哀三分鐘,為了這悲壯的死,更為了著高貴的靈魂。 
    不覺中,耳邊又想起了那首鷹的悲歌……

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善良

一月 13, 2009

在心底,總有一個東西在湧動。它柔和的像羽毛,溫暖的像陽光,細膩的像軟玉,純淨的像水晶…… 
曾經,在丹桂飄香的金秋阻止過採摘桂枝的大手……我想花是樹的情人,不能破壞這美麗的姻緣。 
曾經,因路見不平為素不相識的陌生人說一句公道話,因為相信善良會給弱者帶來希望,會讓自私和不公熔化。 
曾經,在鶯歌燕舞的春天為彎折的小樹澆一瓢清水,因為盼望在藍天白雲下有瑰麗的太陽掛在挺拔的樹梢。 
沒有人要求我這樣做,甚至沒有人要求我這樣想,唯一的理由是為了自己的心能經得起它的拷問,在夜深人靜時能擁有一個舒坦平穩的夢。 
在每個人的心裡,一定有一扇門通向最溫柔的心靈深處,那裡面一定有一個叫做善良的寶貴的東西,一定有的!只要我們鼓起勇氣砸掉那用自私和貪欲鑄成的鎖,就一定會找到心靈深處的善良。 
人世間最寶貴的是什麼?雨果說得好,是善良。 “善良是歷史中稀有的珍珠,善良的人幾乎優於偉大的人。”心懷善良的人,總是在播種陽光和雨露,醫治人們心靈和肉體的創傷。同善良的人接觸,智慧得到啟迪,靈魂變得高尚,胸懷變得更加寬廣。 
善良是發自心底的純樸,像從石縫裡汩汩流出的山泉,清澈,純淨,不帶一點雜質,甚至沒有一絲味道。它不存任何企圖,自然而然地產生著蔓延著,柔潤著身邊的一切,並不顧及在它要去的前方是浩瀚的大海還是清幽的深潭。 
善良無私,在給予善良的時候不會想到回報和好處;善良無價,沒有東西可以評估善良當值幾許;善良不能彩排,自然流露,沒有理由,刻意做出的只能是為滿足私慾的表演;善良不分時間地點,該來就來,如果善良能夠因時因地發生和停止,那善良已經被理性穿上了偽裝的外衣。 
因為善良,看見春草發芽,會欣喜生命的美麗;聞到花朵芬芳,會感激自然的恩賜;度過風霜嚴寒,會珍惜歲月的饋贈;經歷生死考驗,會讚美生活的幸福。那所有擺脫不了的,其實都是自己心上遮掩善良的灰塵。 
我想,對於芸芸眾生來說,也許創造輝煌或走向偉大確實不是一件容易的事,但要擁有一顆平和而善良的心,並以此善待社會、善待他人又似乎是一件並不那麼複雜、那麼困難的事。給迷途者指條路,向落難者伸出一隻手,用陽光般的微笑撫平減輕患者的病痛,用真誠的話鼓勵失落的同事等等,這種看似輕而易舉的行動,其實並不僅僅只是種樸素的善良,而是用善良浸潤後的靈魂折射出來的人格的光輝,是經過善良沐浴後而散發出來的平和心態。 
當人們利用法律,經濟等手段去試圖制止和約束人的不良行為時,卻忘記了只有讓善良回到人們的心中才是解決問題的根本。 
善良不是宗教,但是,善良應該比宗教更本源、更自然、更博大。善良的心有時看起來過於柔軟,但是,如果哪一天人心不再柔軟,不再溫暖,不再富有純潔,那與河灘裡的石子又有什麼分別? 
對好人善良是一種美麗,對惡人善良是一種慈悲。惡人其實更需要他人的善待,因為人性本善,你的真誠和善良可以喚醒他的良知,也許可以讓他從此改過遷善。所以,無條件的善良才是真正的善良。當然,我們所倡導的善良並不是善惡不辨、是非不分,對壞人、壞事一味放縱、寬容的那種毫無原則的愚善,而是意在弘揚真誠、寬容的善良之光。 
擁抱著善良,我們就會擁有一種美好的感覺,就會擁有一種亮麗的情懷,平凡的生命便會顯得生動起來,霞光四溢,普通的世界便會渲染出迷人的色彩。

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surrounding beauty

一月 12, 2009

Short with a black and white banner read, “in memory of  nicotto compatriots in the Nanjing Massacre” a few characters, deep and dignified. Pathetique fonts but can not retain students hurried footsteps, there is nothing new slogan to attract students could not chase the popular eye. In the material to occupy the soul of society, students will always be impetuous haste. Banners before never been short-lived, not to mention it was a long time of staring, the majority of students fruitblog is simply a glimpse at the most seesaa, then go find something else, perhaps just after the surrounding beauty of the handsome young man more attractive. Text appeal far arrived in reality things do not come to an intuitive and cordial. Lonely under the banners in the breeze blowing up and down, it seems that more than 30 million compatriots were massacred  severe beating heart. Banners in the breeze under the impact issue   sound, it seems that more than 30 million compatriots were massacred cried in fear, only a these souls in order to understand the elegy. 

Today’s campus, we will no longer hear the roar Zijinshan, will no longer hear the groans Yuhuatai no longer could hear the bombing in front of large air-raid siren. Thus, the busiest we have learned to forget  ti-da , let us forget this sad past unlimited. 

Banners not far from the historical jugem and cultural institutes “free weekend theaterq-blogs” panels before it comes a group of students, very busy. “Raise their hands” is devoted to today’s anniversary of the play “Red” film, is a comedian Guo Tatsu, starring film. But I do not intend to look at, becausecocolog-nifty reading, self-inductance again will be dull, a waste of time. However, the students gathered abnormal excitement, as a rare movie tickets free of charge, coupled with today’s Saturday, it should be a relaxing day paslog . Watching movies, why not do it?

this day

一月 12, 2009

On this day has arrived quietly in a position of head irresistible come, it is taken by surprise. Today is December 13, as quiet as usual insipid. The difference is that today’s solarpress9 surprisingly good, soft sunny in the frozen earth, immediately once the cold winter to control the dissemination of a glimmer of warmth. Lawn be cooler in those whomakusta become yellow grass, at the moment泛出also a little bit of greenery. Although the breeze blowing, but not biting cold, leaves all left, there appears to bare tree branches sway gently in the breeze under the reciprocating motion of machinery doing. 35 nipox Chilan chirp in the branches, tirelessly called a non-stop. Today is Saturday, most of the students do not have classes gathered at the campus, campus over the previous few days ago swept away when the arrival of the Siberian cold boring, Tim Xu bit crowded. In particular, a main road on this campus really taste travelblog a bit crowded markets. What a piece of warm winter scenes of campus life. 

No doubt, this is a rare sunny winter. However, under clear skies this how many people thoughtblogourt of Nanjing, reminds me of 71 years ago today, reminds us that life can not of national humiliation on December 13, 1937. 

December 13, 1937 following the fall of Nanjing, Japanese troops in Nanjing and the surrounding arearakuten for several months of mass killings. Iwane Matsui in the Central China Front Army commander and 6 Division under the command of fascists such as, for me unarmed compatriots for as long as six weeks of brutal mass murder of innocent blogspace citizens were killed and more than 30 soldiers million people, including 20,000 women and girls who have been devastated. 

Today, however, is “the anniversary of the Nanjing Massacre.” 
Huge open campus, hardly any of the memorial activities, the only institute of history and culture produced the five-meter-long banner hanging in the remotesienta corner of the campus, others have long been forgotten, perhaps only the teachers shashin-haiku and students of history can still be charged live in such tragic anniversary.

invisible force

一月 12, 2009

Northland wind is too strong or too cold this winter andauto-blog snow, most recently my thoughts are often cut off, frozen, how are put together do not stand up. 

Have been trying very hard to write-point text, on the affection and love, friendship, life sentiment, social Vientiane, have all in my mind float can always difficult casualty Chengzhang, not only wrote the title is only a hair, thinking on the run aground. I always feel that, in my mind or the depths of the  toutlecine soul, a group of ghost, a group of ants cause trouble, they sometimes jump roll, sometimes raise hue and cry, sometimes latent Moran, torture was not sweet, I eat, sleep can not sleep, often just floating on my mind a number of small inspiration, but fleeting. 

These days, I always love the memories and reality of ghosts. I often think of the old house home unoccupied long time, so a cold winter’s firewood light yet, the father’s cough is increased, the mother returned home several weeks, and how not to do with clothes, the original unit Several small brothers love what progress has been made, next year’s price is not going to drop, the performance of wages when they could deliver … … a series of question marks in the minds of the roundabout. Different taste, different levels of things to Chen before us, how difficult a loss as to how to sort out. 
I even suspect that it is the 5.12 earthquake bricoblog broken my nerves, or with age, 30 rather than the harsh reality of legislation bend my back? I touch his forehead with his hands, there is no fever, it should be sober-minded, mental not stupid, otherwise, the day I would not for that sick students contributions, this afternoon I will binge drinking of high-intensity Liquor … … 

Wanted to come closer, my heart is probably not quiet down, but also perhaps the mission was even heavier, stronger sense of responsibility instead. At home, the father, husband, son; in the unit, a teacher, colleagues, “chores” Finishing; and in the community, friends, young, who show no understanding. In this way, we are often about some invisible force, and to act against the wishes of the matter, said some words, then do not live true self. Sometimes, however pure envy Zhuangzi Tao Qian’s inaction or indifferent nourishing Seclusion, which is a holding affordable, fit, is a kind of stay away from the scene of God set free gas, and we often find themselves unable to indulge in a secular way, how sad! I would like to turn, if done or Zhuangzi Tao Yuanming, it also is somewhat pessimistic about the world-weary, and not a way to escape, which also face the challenge boldly. In this way, their hearts will be relieved of. 

The text is a  myspace good thing, can be accommodated in tears and laughter, but also silence. Because young arrogant, impatient because the character, I did not really integrate into one. Later, unconsciously, it will be captured, even gradually obsessedcuisineblog on it. When a **** mood flowing in betweendesignblog  the lines, the heart of pleasure also Qingquan as flowing, the moment, it must be easy. 

This cold season, I was thinking of the plight of a very jittery mood. This is not monbebeblog   the end. 

When I sit back and look at the spirit of the trend, I a breath of spring slowly approaching, scattered spirituality blogpartywill float to the surface, such as sparkling Chunshui ha.

happy together

一月 9, 2009

Life is impermanence of separation eliminate almost all of Yi. 
Lin is a hi scattered people who were not happy together, she said the end of Poly or powder, but even more sad, is not as good as non-poly. Perhaps the pessimists are always like this. For fear that the possibility of a maximum of only 50 percent of the bad outcome, he rejected the whole process, refused to start. 
Perhaps, I am also a pessimist now. 

On separation. I used to always be with friends, said: meet, respectively, but the beginning of separation is a continuation together. In fact, I was in the deceptive, and then self-deception. Most can not afford is often the separation of myself. 
However, I always send the others to leave. Spring and Autumn each year, two were from the injury over time. In many cases, the mentality a bit better I would tell myself, said: drunk with laughter Jun 3000 games, does not appeal from the injury. Containing very frankly and then send you one by one to leave. The mentality of a bad time, I looked at the clock just to stay at home alone in tears. In fact, to send or send, are the same uncomfortable. 

With the passage of time, I extreme pessimism seems to have been unable to salvation. I was experiencing an increasing number of separation, as well as fewer and fewer of farewell. 
Those subtle long time, there will always be unable to resist tears and miss. If the glass heart, one place. Hair Fascinators Fashion Hats Men hats Hats Wholesale Plastic Bag canvas bag